A Song is as Simple as Rhyming with ‘Nipple’



Last night I went on a rhyming frenzy. It started out with improvising a song about nipples that grossed out Boo until I pointed out the genius in being able to rhyme that word for a good 5 minutes straight (it’s still in the works but I’m thinking this could be the next best sing-along song since “Sweet Caroline”). Then I couldn’t stop. He said, “Goodnight.” I said, “Sleep tight.” He said, “I love you.” I said, “And I you, Boo.” He said, “Please stop.” I said, “Weep not.”

In the past, I found it hard to speak in conversations. It was hard to start an interesting topic, and once a topic was found I then struggled with adding to it. I found it hard being myself and cracking jokes because all too often it seemed that my sense of humor was either taken too seriously, or went right over people’s pretty, ping-pong sized heads (I have a soft spot for alliteration as well).

When I started writing songs in middle and high school, I finally found a way to say it all in a perfectly crafted and whimsical manner.  And from there music and writing were my outlets to say everything that was kept inside of this open 24/7 mind. I could get everything off my chest from unrequited love to missing lost loved ones, from self-reflection to even self-loathing. I’ve used songwriting to say things with a charm and grace I never have in real life. I’ve used it to be funny, and I’ve used it to be downright outrageous. It has allowed me to have a voice, any voice I want.

So for my other Chi people out there I encourage you to try and do the same. Take your fears, doubts, joy and anger and turn it into a song! Can’t sing? Turn it into some fine slam poetry.  Write a Haiku. Just jot it down, even if it’s only for yourself. I promise you that by the end of your song you won’t be able to help by smile at the little art you have just created.

I, myself, had an awful morning. And after a lot of huffing and puffing the first thing to put a smile on my face today was this little song I made up a while ago for such occasions. I have only shared this with one other person in my life so I trust you all to take it for what it is and use it until you find your voice. Use it only to survive, never to attack…

(To the Melody of “Here Comes Santa Claus”)

I hate everyone

I hate everyone

I hate him, her, and you

I hate all the boys and

I hate all the girls and

I wish they would turn to poo

And I couldn’t give a single shit of what they have to say

And with any luck they’ll all fuck a duck and get the hell out of my way (hey!)

So if you’ve been inspired at all to write your own thing today, share it with the comments section, I’d love to read what you came up with!

Until next time, ChiGirls, here is my new shirt that accurately represents my mood today…



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